DigitalPR With Celestine Achi: MY SWIPE AT JONATHAN - A poem by Edith Ohaja

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MY SWIPE AT JONATHAN - A poem by Edith Ohaja

Wednesday, August 12, 2015


Since lots of people are still abusing Jonathan, I too will do my bit
Though he was declared loser and refused to contest the election results
Many people can't drink a glass of water or sleep at night without insulting him
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Let's begin with the flawless elections that ushered him out of office
He appointed his friend and kinsman umpire and interfered with the process throughout
He has also been bitter in defeat, criticizing the new government at every turn
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When you speak of corruption, don't you know he started it all?
He conceived, birthed, christened and nurtured this hitherto unknown plague
That is why some think the current war on corruption should begin and end with him
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Why didn't he fight systemic corruption, if not that the whole thing was his baby?
He used antiquated systems of public service wage payments, thereby encouraging ghost workers
He couldn't even stamp out fraud in fertilizer distribution 'cause he'd never heard of direct e-wallet payment
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And see how he bungled the war on insurgency by failing to involve our neighbours
He refused to declare state of emergency in the affected areas thinking it was a child's play
And he cut off funding to the military, made no effort to procure the right arms and ammunition
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I'm still angry about the insurgency because he kept the West from designating BH a terror group
He initiated the Leahy law and invited Uncle Sam to scuttle an arms purchase deal in the Rainbow Nation
He didn't even buy arms from the two big Reds so we could retake land from BH and ensure safe elections
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On the economy, he caused the shrinking of our GDP; we fell in our ranking in Africa and the world
He didn't revive our industries, not even the automobile sector or refineries
He failed to make us a preferred investment destination; what foreign investments did he attract?
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Without power, the economy is paralyzed - cost of production multiplies and consumers pay dearly
Yet, he didn't unbundle and privatize the power sector or embark on capacity building for technical staff
He enjoyed maximum support and zero sabotage, yet he didn't build or improve capacity utilization of power plants
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In the field of education, he left the almajiris to roam the streets and become tools in the hands of hoodlums
When he could have built schools and enlisted them to get an education fully funded by government
He didn't build a single tertiary institution, didn't establish TETFund; he left things just the way he found them
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Coming to agriculture, he had a smooth-talking minister who didn't really know his job
Would you believe they did nothing about irrigation, mechanization and improved storage systems?
No wonder when this minister sought a job at the ADB, he was turned back with his tail between his legs
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That reminds me of his crew - some inventive speaker said he ran a kindergarten presidency
Why didn't he look for renowned technocrats who he could harness their industry experience?
That is why the Finance Lady was censured by Yale and the SEC Lady lost a spot at the World Bank
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Talking about ladies, he didn't fully recognize their worth or feature them prominently enough
His is the worst record in female representation in government in Nigeria to date
Even the Nigerian Defence Academy still does not admit ladies, all thanks to him
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And look what he did with the press, refusing to sign the Freedom of Information Act
He had all the media on a tight leash, even enacting laws to kill free expression on the Internet
No one dared wag a tongue at him, one word and his hounds would pounce on you
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A vintage maximum ruler he was with no desire to work within democratic ideals
He fought the independence of the legislature and judiciary like he'd never heard of separation of powers
And he spread fear in the land; political assassinations became the order of the day
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I could go on and on but I'm sure you've seen so far what an odious ruler Jonathan was
And now that I've done the in-thing - joined my compatriots to take a huge swipe at him
I believe I can have some peace and find something better to do with my time
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 An Illustration by Chigozie Joshua
Ⓒ Edith Ugochi Ohaja 2015

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